Does your family eat with elbows on the table? Food in their mouth? Do they back talk you? What are some good ways to deal with rude behavior? If your family is anything like mine, you may have some work to do.
It seems that today’s kids are bombarded with images of rude behavior - on TV, the bus, or in the classroom. It's considered "normal" to see kids wearing earphones while having a conversation with someone, or to spend hours on the phone or computer without regard to other family members needs.
So, what are some ways to deal with this behavior, and work towards modifying it? Let's look at some ideas:
1) Start by saying "Please," "Thank you," and "You're welcome." This is one of the most basic forms of etiquette, and one that people will appreciate anywhere, not just the table. Use these words all the time with your children, and they will start using them too. Role play, if that helps.
2) Offer to help. Help set the table or clear the table. Imagine how impressed friends parents would be if your child helps with dinner! Definite brownie points with the girlfriend/boyfriend if the parents see this as the child gets older! These kids are sure to be invited over again.
3) Positive reinforcement - Point out the good behavior when you see it. Children like to please their parents, especially younger children. As a parent, I know that my daughter responds much better to positive reinforcement then to me yelling “No, don’t do that!”
4) Have a conversation - not a noise-fest! Don't allow children (or adults!) to talk with food in their mouths, or to chew with their mouth open. These noises are aggravating to some, and no one wants to see the food you've got in your mouth.
5) Begin teaching etiquette from an early age. Many kids have never been told not to put their elbows on the table, or to put their napkin in their lap. Kids don't automatically know what to do or what is right or wrong. It is amazing the number of dates that go unrepeated because of poor dinner manners, or the number of job interviews that have been flunked over a lunch meeting. Start kids on the right track early!
Keep in mind, these are only my suggestions. What are some of your tips for teaching your kids manners at the dinner table? Any creative suggestions? What has worked and hasn't worked? I'd love to hear your ideas!
I wrote this blog post while participating in the SocialMoms and Kraft Homestyle Macaroni and Cheese blogging program, for a free gift card worth $50. For information on how you can participate, click here.
