It's 4:15 and I can't sleep. I'm not sure why. For some reason I was insanely hungry, so I got up to have yogurt. Then I was like "Well, I can't eat my yogurt in bed. I'll see if Kim is online." She isn't. :-( So instead I had to read her LJ and eat my yogurt. It made me happy to see that I had been especially singled out and mentioned in her "list of people to be grateful for" so that was fun. Thanks Kim!
Today I have my training for Pampered Chef. That should be an adventure. I'm trying to get at least 4 parties booked, because my recruiter, Kathy, is like "Well, normally I don't fully sign someone until they have at least 4 shows booked." So I'm like "Crap." And the first person that has booked a show wants to do a wedding registry. Unfortunately, I can't set up her registry until I've had 4 shows. So come on people!!! Book a show with me!
Today is going to be one of those days, too, that I really miss all of my old roommates from the Gables - it's Earth Day! Kim G. always used to make a cake and we would have an Earth Day party. Kind of silly, I know, but a ton of fun :-) We always had an excuse to make a cake in that apartment. It was great! :-)
I wish I could say I had something great and wonderful to write about. Sadly, I do not... We signed the mortgage paperwork on our house on Thursday. That's exciting! Now we just need to get the homeowners insurance, and we'll be good to go! I am so excited to close on the house it's not even funny. Unfortunately, we won't get to keep the hot tub. The seller was being a jerk about it, so we just decided not to buy it from her after all. Kind of sad, but at the same time, I don't think I'll really miss it. Hot tubs really aren't good for me with all of the UTI/Kidney problems I've been having.
Oh! Oh my goodness, I can't believe I forgot about this! I finally had that conversation with Tricia on Thursday. It went a lot better than I was expecting, partly because the disconnect I was feeling was something she had picked up on too. Neither of us could quite put our finger on it, but we agreed that in supervision, I would point out to her when I was feeling it and she would point out to me when she was feeling it and we would try to go from there. Personally, I think she just doesn't like me as much as she likes some of the other people in the office, but you know what? That's alright. I can live with that, especially because I have the support of the other two coordinators in the office. So anyway, that's where we stand on that. Hopefully, now, some good will come of it. Fortunately, I have only two weeks left of trainings, and then I'll be on a regular supervision schedule, and that will probably help to some degree. Plus, I'll be able to carry a full caseload, so that will make supervision a little more meaningful. I won't have only 4 cases in which to be like "Yep, here's where these are all at... okay, thanks bye!"
Anyway, that's about all on this end. I don't really know what else I can write about. It's taken me almost 1/2 an hour to come up with this, and let me say, it's a BORING entry :-) So thanks for reading. Peace, love and granola!
Saturday, April 22, 2006
Wednesday, April 19, 2006
My First
Last night I had my first removal of a child. The baby is (as of today) 7 days old (so, six days at the day of removal). It was a hard decision for the office to make, but we had the legal ability to remove on the "likely to suffer harm" part of the statute. Mom had been drinking through her entire pregnancy (for the most part), and fortunately for the baby, he had no physical signs of Fetal Alcohol Syndrome. Unfortunately though, he's too young to tell if he will have any sort of developmental delays. He was the cutest baby! You know, the kind that makes you want to run right out and start having kids. He slept the whole time, and we were with the family for about 2 hours.
I almost felt guilty last night though. I was totally hyped up on adrenaline because of this removal. From what I hear, it's normal, but looking back on it now, it was such a sad thing! The mom burst into tears when we told her what was happening, and today when I was at a meeting at the court, she was there. Part of me is greatful that I was more just there, it wasn't really my removal, because she didn't really aknowledge me. Cheryl, on the other hand, had to get up and leave the room before the mom saw her. What made it worse was that my schedule today didn't allow for time to process what had happened with anyone. Fortunately, Cheryl and I were in one car last night, and it allowed me to talk it through with her. Tomorrow, though, I'm going to try to have a sit down with Tricia and process it with her. I want to discuss with her the adrenaline rush I had and make sure that I was definitely feeling something that was normal. She would really be the one to ask - she's been in this field for 12 years. I'm also going to try to have my sit down with her tomorrow. From what I understand, I'm not the first person to have this problem with Tricia. So it will be interesting to see what happens.
Today my day was just busy. Long and busy. I met the cutest girl today at the Child Advocacy Center. We had a staff meeting this morning, then I was at the CAC, then off to a meeting with the judge in Portsmouth, then back to the office for 1/2 an hour, then off to a meeting in Seabrook. The little girl at my interview in Seabrook was so funny - she had a loose tooth that fell out during my interview with her. It was hysterical. She was so excited she started running all around the house "Mom! Mom! My tooth fell out! My tooth fell out!" I had to go to the house with the Seabrook police, so there were two detectives, which was funny because she asked one of them to help her clean her tooth off. It cracked me up! The sad part of the interview though, was when I was just getting ready to wrap up, and she hadn't told me anything concerning, until I asked her if there was anything I didn't ask her about that she thought I should know about. She told me that I should ask her if she knew what drugs were. So I did. She proceeded to tell me that good drugs are the ones you take when you have a cold, and that drugs like "weed" are bad drugs and that she has an uncle that uses weed. I'm like "great.... we were doing so good until that came up." So now tomorrow I've got to report that to the supervisor of the worker that's actually on the case and the worker. I'm glad that's not one of mine.
Thank goodness for comp time. Thank goodness even more that I've not got enough comp time acrued to take two days off when we move! That makes me happy. That also reminds me that I've got to fill in the comp time slip. Cheryl and I were out until 7:30 last night and I was out until 6:15 tonight, plus not taking a lunch today, so 7:15.
My doctors appointment... well, lets just say that my doctor is useless. I don't remember if I wrote about this or not, but he took a urine sample while I was there. That was it. That, and he told me that I wasn't actually having pain in my kidneys because my kidneys weren't even where I was complaining of pain. Well, the guy wasn't even looking when I told him where it was, he listed it as being a pain in my hip. It's not my hip, it was my side and back. So when he had the nurses run a quick test on the urine sample, he was like "well, it's not normal, but it's not abnormal." So, tell me, what is between normal and abnormal? Because I didn't know there was middle ground there. Hopefully tomorrow I should get some answers.
Anyway, that's about all for now. It's time for dinner.
I almost felt guilty last night though. I was totally hyped up on adrenaline because of this removal. From what I hear, it's normal, but looking back on it now, it was such a sad thing! The mom burst into tears when we told her what was happening, and today when I was at a meeting at the court, she was there. Part of me is greatful that I was more just there, it wasn't really my removal, because she didn't really aknowledge me. Cheryl, on the other hand, had to get up and leave the room before the mom saw her. What made it worse was that my schedule today didn't allow for time to process what had happened with anyone. Fortunately, Cheryl and I were in one car last night, and it allowed me to talk it through with her. Tomorrow, though, I'm going to try to have a sit down with Tricia and process it with her. I want to discuss with her the adrenaline rush I had and make sure that I was definitely feeling something that was normal. She would really be the one to ask - she's been in this field for 12 years. I'm also going to try to have my sit down with her tomorrow. From what I understand, I'm not the first person to have this problem with Tricia. So it will be interesting to see what happens.
Today my day was just busy. Long and busy. I met the cutest girl today at the Child Advocacy Center. We had a staff meeting this morning, then I was at the CAC, then off to a meeting with the judge in Portsmouth, then back to the office for 1/2 an hour, then off to a meeting in Seabrook. The little girl at my interview in Seabrook was so funny - she had a loose tooth that fell out during my interview with her. It was hysterical. She was so excited she started running all around the house "Mom! Mom! My tooth fell out! My tooth fell out!" I had to go to the house with the Seabrook police, so there were two detectives, which was funny because she asked one of them to help her clean her tooth off. It cracked me up! The sad part of the interview though, was when I was just getting ready to wrap up, and she hadn't told me anything concerning, until I asked her if there was anything I didn't ask her about that she thought I should know about. She told me that I should ask her if she knew what drugs were. So I did. She proceeded to tell me that good drugs are the ones you take when you have a cold, and that drugs like "weed" are bad drugs and that she has an uncle that uses weed. I'm like "great.... we were doing so good until that came up." So now tomorrow I've got to report that to the supervisor of the worker that's actually on the case and the worker. I'm glad that's not one of mine.
Thank goodness for comp time. Thank goodness even more that I've not got enough comp time acrued to take two days off when we move! That makes me happy. That also reminds me that I've got to fill in the comp time slip. Cheryl and I were out until 7:30 last night and I was out until 6:15 tonight, plus not taking a lunch today, so 7:15.
My doctors appointment... well, lets just say that my doctor is useless. I don't remember if I wrote about this or not, but he took a urine sample while I was there. That was it. That, and he told me that I wasn't actually having pain in my kidneys because my kidneys weren't even where I was complaining of pain. Well, the guy wasn't even looking when I told him where it was, he listed it as being a pain in my hip. It's not my hip, it was my side and back. So when he had the nurses run a quick test on the urine sample, he was like "well, it's not normal, but it's not abnormal." So, tell me, what is between normal and abnormal? Because I didn't know there was middle ground there. Hopefully tomorrow I should get some answers.
Anyway, that's about all for now. It's time for dinner.
Tuesday, April 18, 2006
Doctors today
Today I go to my primary care doctor to have the follow up from when I was in the hospital. He didn't tell me I couldn't eat any breakfast or anything before I go, but I'm going to fast until I get there, because I don't know what kind of tests (if any) he'll order. I'm hoping he will order something! Just saying "You have a kidney infection" isn't going to cut it with me anymore. So basically I'm going to go in and demand a referral to the kidney specialist (who can't take me in until June 1st), demand they get me in with the nephrologist sooner, and demand that they do some of the legwork. I don't want to be told that the antibiotics did their job because that's just bullshit.
Yesterday I was going to try to have a sitdown with my supervisor at work and let her know that I was having a hard time feeling like I was connecting with her. Some of that is really no one's fault, just scheduling issues - I haven't had supervision for two weeks! So anyway, I was all prepared to meet up with her, when she came up to me and asked if she could meet with me earlier than planned, because she had to leave in the afternoon. So I was like "yeah, sure, no problem" and we met right then. So after going through all of my cases, and figuring out where I was at with all of them, she was like "so, how's everything else going?" And I was all prepared to lead up to how I felt that I was having a hard time connecting with her, and I got out about how I felt that I was feeling disconnected from everyone in the office (which to some degree is true), and then I was all ready to launch into how I was feeling about her, and I just got this sense that she wasn't listening. I didn't even approach it. Then when Cheryl asked me how it went (Cheryl is my mentor, and she would be the first person I would talk to about that stuff), I told her that I couldn't even get into it with Tricia (my supervisor), and that what I was able to get out probably didn't make much of an impact. She's going to talk to Thom (Cheryl's supervisor - who I happen to have a great relationship with), and hopefully the 3 of us can figure out how to approach this.
I think part of the disconnect has come from me just being out of the office, but at the same time, I get nervous that this job really isn't for me... I thought I was going to go at it with all of this gusto, and I haven't. I haven't shirked my responsibilities at work, in fact, I've embraced them, but sometimes I just don't know if this was the right decision for me. It makes me so sad, I don't even know where to start. I think I'm going to have to go back on my wellbutrin, I told John the other day. I don't want too, but I can feel myself crashing down, and I want to put the brakes on that before I hit the bottom and do something to ruin my relationship with John, blow the chances of buying a house, etc. I love and respect John too much to put him through that with me. But mostly, I respect myself too much to let my past come back to haunt me.
The worst feeling in the world is knowing that the system has failed someone. I know people that have been failed by the state, and I don't want to let that happen. I feel like I'm taking on the world, and maybe I am, but I don't think I would live with myself knowing I failed someone...
Anyway, this is a depressing entry - I started it with the intent of just talking about my doctors appointment today, and it turned into everything about my job... I guess that's my signal to go shower and get on with my day.
Yesterday I was going to try to have a sitdown with my supervisor at work and let her know that I was having a hard time feeling like I was connecting with her. Some of that is really no one's fault, just scheduling issues - I haven't had supervision for two weeks! So anyway, I was all prepared to meet up with her, when she came up to me and asked if she could meet with me earlier than planned, because she had to leave in the afternoon. So I was like "yeah, sure, no problem" and we met right then. So after going through all of my cases, and figuring out where I was at with all of them, she was like "so, how's everything else going?" And I was all prepared to lead up to how I felt that I was having a hard time connecting with her, and I got out about how I felt that I was feeling disconnected from everyone in the office (which to some degree is true), and then I was all ready to launch into how I was feeling about her, and I just got this sense that she wasn't listening. I didn't even approach it. Then when Cheryl asked me how it went (Cheryl is my mentor, and she would be the first person I would talk to about that stuff), I told her that I couldn't even get into it with Tricia (my supervisor), and that what I was able to get out probably didn't make much of an impact. She's going to talk to Thom (Cheryl's supervisor - who I happen to have a great relationship with), and hopefully the 3 of us can figure out how to approach this.
I think part of the disconnect has come from me just being out of the office, but at the same time, I get nervous that this job really isn't for me... I thought I was going to go at it with all of this gusto, and I haven't. I haven't shirked my responsibilities at work, in fact, I've embraced them, but sometimes I just don't know if this was the right decision for me. It makes me so sad, I don't even know where to start. I think I'm going to have to go back on my wellbutrin, I told John the other day. I don't want too, but I can feel myself crashing down, and I want to put the brakes on that before I hit the bottom and do something to ruin my relationship with John, blow the chances of buying a house, etc. I love and respect John too much to put him through that with me. But mostly, I respect myself too much to let my past come back to haunt me.
The worst feeling in the world is knowing that the system has failed someone. I know people that have been failed by the state, and I don't want to let that happen. I feel like I'm taking on the world, and maybe I am, but I don't think I would live with myself knowing I failed someone...
Anyway, this is a depressing entry - I started it with the intent of just talking about my doctors appointment today, and it turned into everything about my job... I guess that's my signal to go shower and get on with my day.
Saturday, April 15, 2006
Big Decision
Okay, so it's not that big in relation to buying a house, BUT, I've decided to become a consultant for the Pampered Chef. Anyone who isn't familiar with the Pampered Chef should e-mail me or IM me to find out more about it, because it's really a neat company. They sell all sorts of cookware and kitchen gadgets, and they have a lot of perks for the consultants (i.e. money, free products, trips, etc.). I was really back and forth last night about whether or not I wanted to do Pampered Chef or Silpada (which is a company that sells stearling silver jewelry), but ultimately went with Pampered Chef because the incentives were good for BOTH John and I, not just me, and you have the ability to set up a website through Pampered Chef where people can order products through me.
I'm really excited to get started, and I'm hoping that people will support me in this endeavor! It's going to be a source of extra income for us as we start working on putting together a new house, and needing to get new furniture and whatnot.
So, if you're interested in hosting a party, some dates I've got set aside for it specifically are May 13th, June 10, July 8 and July 15. I could throw in a couple other weekends there too, but I wanted to make sure that everyone is aware that I cannot do June 3rd or 4th (thats the weekend we're moving), June 17th (my sister is graduating from high school!) and the first weekend in July (the 1st or 2nd) because we are hoping to have our housewarming party then.
So think about it and let me know. Thanks guys!!!
I'm really excited to get started, and I'm hoping that people will support me in this endeavor! It's going to be a source of extra income for us as we start working on putting together a new house, and needing to get new furniture and whatnot.
So, if you're interested in hosting a party, some dates I've got set aside for it specifically are May 13th, June 10, July 8 and July 15. I could throw in a couple other weekends there too, but I wanted to make sure that everyone is aware that I cannot do June 3rd or 4th (thats the weekend we're moving), June 17th (my sister is graduating from high school!) and the first weekend in July (the 1st or 2nd) because we are hoping to have our housewarming party then.
So think about it and let me know. Thanks guys!!!
Thursday, April 13, 2006
May 30th
May 30th is the magic date! We got the house, which was amazing, because there are still offers coming in on it!!! We close on May 30th, which is almost a full month earlier than we were expecting, but that's GREAT for us to get out of our lease.
So at some point we'll be having a housewarming cookout or something so everyone can come see our new place. Granted, at the moment, we don't have enough furniture to fill the place yet, but I'm sure that will come with time :-) Oh, and bring your swim suits when you come - we're going to have a hot tub that seats 5!
So thanks for all the love and good thoughts, they worked!!!
So at some point we'll be having a housewarming cookout or something so everyone can come see our new place. Granted, at the moment, we don't have enough furniture to fill the place yet, but I'm sure that will come with time :-) Oh, and bring your swim suits when you come - we're going to have a hot tub that seats 5!
So thanks for all the love and good thoughts, they worked!!!
Wednesday, April 12, 2006
I just got this
I just got this e-mail from our realtor:
I just got a call from the agent...she is meeting with the sellers tonight at 8:45pm...she thinks they will accept and change nothing in the offer and we are all set
for the home inspection tomorow night...see you at 5...I will meet you at the property. Don't forget to bring both the first and second deposit check to the home inspection. I will congratulate you as soon as I have the paperwork in had...:)
w00p w00p w00p w00p w00p w00p w00p w00p w00p w00p w00p!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I can't even begin to tell you how psyched I am!!!!
I just got a call from the agent...she is meeting with the sellers tonight at 8:45pm...she thinks they will accept and change nothing in the offer and we are all set
for the home inspection tomorow night...see you at 5...I will meet you at the property. Don't forget to bring both the first and second deposit check to the home inspection. I will congratulate you as soon as I have the paperwork in had...:)
w00p w00p w00p w00p w00p w00p w00p w00p w00p w00p w00p!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I can't even begin to tell you how psyched I am!!!!
Here's where we're at right now
So last night we went to see 3 more houses. We made an offer on one last night. It is this great 4 bedroom cape in E. Rochester. It's just so perfect! It's in great shape, hardly any work needs to be done to it, and, to top it off, I had a dream about making an offer on this exact house at one point! Our realtor is a little nervous though, because of the condition of the house and the asking price, she's pretty sure we'll be tied up in a multi-offer situation. So we had to make our offer look at appealing as possible. We still haven't heard anything yet, but then, the sellers have 48 hours to respond to an offer. I am hoping they're not taking so long because they got more than one offer last night. So everyone be sending love and happy thoughts our way. I will post as soon as I can after we hear anything.
The house is everything we could want, it's got just the right number of rooms, it has a finished basement that John can make into a lesson/practice studio, it just all seems to good to be true. So again, keep the love and happy thoughts coming - I hope we'll have an answer tonight!
The house is everything we could want, it's got just the right number of rooms, it has a finished basement that John can make into a lesson/practice studio, it just all seems to good to be true. So again, keep the love and happy thoughts coming - I hope we'll have an answer tonight!
Tuesday, April 4, 2006
Back to life again...
So this has been an interesting week thus far - Sunday, John and I brought our parents to see the house we had the offer on, and after them going through it all, we realized this was not the house we want, and ended up backing out of the deal yesterday.
Sunday night, John and I were just hanging out at home, when suddenly, I started to not feel so well. By 8:30 I was in bed, and by 9, I was EXTREMELY sick - I won't give you the details, but I'll put it this way: Picture the Norwalk Virus, or an insanely bad flu - now picture it all coming on within 20 minutes. But on top of it, I was having pain in my kidney area. I've had two prior kidney infections, and I knew that if it wasn't treated, it could make you very sick and then spread into your bloodstream. So at midnight, I had John drive me to the ER. At first they thought they would just give me something for nausea and maybe an antibiotic via IV, but when they drew blood and got the results, they were like "Umm, we're going to have to admit you - you have a very serious kidney infection and you need IV antibiotics." I had spiked a fever of 102.1 and was seriously dehydrated (as I had been unable to keep even water down). So at 2 in the morning, I was officially admitted into the hospital. John stayed with me until about 3:30, then went back home to sleep. He came back the next day though, as did my mom after she got out of work, and I spent a lot of time on the phone with people. I got IV antibiotics about every 12 hours, which made me kind of drowsy. My fever kept going up and down, but fortunately it was not even reaching the point it was at before. Finally, today, my doctor came in and said they would start me on oral antibiotics, and depending on how I tolerated it, I would be released tonight. I slept pretty well last night, with my fever breaking sometime during the night. It kept going up and down a little, but it was minor - like from 99.3 to 97.1 to 99.3 again. Fortunately, I tolerated the medication just fine, and was discharged around 5.
So now I'm home, and it's back to life as usual. I have to follow up with my doctor in 2 weeks, and we'll see what's going on then. I hope I'm fully better by then. I still have some slight pain in my kidney area, and I also have some pain in my upper back, which is weird, because I didn't have that before. I'm attributing it to the incredibly uncomfortable beds.
So I'm going to go relax some more and just be happy to not have an IV in my arm anymore.
Sunday night, John and I were just hanging out at home, when suddenly, I started to not feel so well. By 8:30 I was in bed, and by 9, I was EXTREMELY sick - I won't give you the details, but I'll put it this way: Picture the Norwalk Virus, or an insanely bad flu - now picture it all coming on within 20 minutes. But on top of it, I was having pain in my kidney area. I've had two prior kidney infections, and I knew that if it wasn't treated, it could make you very sick and then spread into your bloodstream. So at midnight, I had John drive me to the ER. At first they thought they would just give me something for nausea and maybe an antibiotic via IV, but when they drew blood and got the results, they were like "Umm, we're going to have to admit you - you have a very serious kidney infection and you need IV antibiotics." I had spiked a fever of 102.1 and was seriously dehydrated (as I had been unable to keep even water down). So at 2 in the morning, I was officially admitted into the hospital. John stayed with me until about 3:30, then went back home to sleep. He came back the next day though, as did my mom after she got out of work, and I spent a lot of time on the phone with people. I got IV antibiotics about every 12 hours, which made me kind of drowsy. My fever kept going up and down, but fortunately it was not even reaching the point it was at before. Finally, today, my doctor came in and said they would start me on oral antibiotics, and depending on how I tolerated it, I would be released tonight. I slept pretty well last night, with my fever breaking sometime during the night. It kept going up and down a little, but it was minor - like from 99.3 to 97.1 to 99.3 again. Fortunately, I tolerated the medication just fine, and was discharged around 5.
So now I'm home, and it's back to life as usual. I have to follow up with my doctor in 2 weeks, and we'll see what's going on then. I hope I'm fully better by then. I still have some slight pain in my kidney area, and I also have some pain in my upper back, which is weird, because I didn't have that before. I'm attributing it to the incredibly uncomfortable beds.
So I'm going to go relax some more and just be happy to not have an IV in my arm anymore.
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